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Relatable·Culture· Sep 23, 2026 · 9 min

Why Opening With 'Sorry, My English Is Bad' Backfires in America

A former grad student recalls being chewed out by a US advisor for apologizing for their English, and Japan debates where humility ends and self-deprecation begins.

What's going on

In Japan, it's common to open with a little self-lowering before asking for anyone's time or attention. A gift comes with "it's nothing much," a speech starts with "I'm not very good at this," and a Japanese speaker presenting in English will often begin with "Sorry, my English is bad." It's meant as courtesy — a way of not putting yourself above the audience.

A Japanese researcher recalled doing exactly that during a presentation as a grad student in the US, and getting a long lecture from their advisor for it. The lesson they took away: Americans value humility too, but they show it differently — by staying confident about your own work and giving credit to the people who helped you, rather than by running yourself down.

Japanese has two words that sit close together here: kenson (謙遜), modesty or declining praise, and hige (卑下), actively belittling yourself. Many of the replies below are about the gap between the two.

Comments

Back when I was a grad student in the US, I said “sorry my English is bad” at the start of a research presentation and my advisor absolutely chewed me out. Something like: “We can tell your English is bad just by listening. Don’t waste the audience’s time on that. We’re not here to grade your English.” Then I got a long, thorough lecture. “I know Japanese people are modest, but
アメリカ大学院生の頃、研究発表プレゼンで「英語下手でごめんね」と言ったら指導教授からくそ怒られた。「英語が下手なのは聞けばわかる。そんなことで聴衆の時間を奪うな。俺たちは君の英語を評価しに来たんじゃない。」みたいなこと言われて懇々と説教された。「日本人が謙虚なのは知ってるが
that attitude just makes you look like someone with no confidence, and it makes your findings less credible." The funny thing is, in America if you go full “Aren’t I amazing? Aren’t I the best?” people hate that too. So what do you do? When you present, be totally confident, and praise other people.
君の態度は単に自信ない奴と取られるだけで、発表の信憑性が下がる」と。でも面白いのはアメリカでも「俺すごいだろ?俺最高だろ?」という態度だとそれはそれででも嫌われるということ。じゃあどうすればいいかというと、プレゼンなどをするときは自信満々で発表しつつ、人を褒めるといい。
Like, this result is thanks to my teammates working hard, thanks to the support staff behind the scenes, and so on. Being humble is a virtue in America too and people like it, but it’s a bit different from the Japanese way of putting yourself down (“oh, I’m really nothing special” etc.), so watch out.
この成果はチームメイトが頑張ってくれたおかげ、支えてくれた裏方さんのおかげ、などなど。アメリカでも謙虚(Humble)は美徳とされ、好意的に受け取られるが、日本のように自分を卑下する感じ(私なんか全然大したことないですよ等)とはちょっと違うので注意が必要。
So when you present at a conference or anywhere in the US, always make an acknowledgements slide. Usually you give thanks at the end, but some presenters do it right at the start. Leaving it out makes a really negative impression. I mean it.
ということで、アメリカで学会発表などプレゼンテーションするときは必ず「謝辞(acknowledgements)」のページを作りましょう。通常は最後に謝辞を述べますが、一番最初にこれを述べる発表者もいます。謝辞がないと非常にネガティブな印象を与えます。ほんとです。
So self-deprecation and humility are different things. Good story. I got called out on this a lot when I was living and working in Shanghai too.
卑下と謙虚は違うと。いい話。 上海住んで仕事していた時もよく注意されたなあ。
Really useful post. I think that’s exactly right. As a Japanese-English interpreter I run into this kind of situation all the time.
たいへん有益な投稿。そのとおりだと思います。 日英通訳者としてこのよくな場面によく遭遇します。
Same here. When I’m running practice sessions for international conference talks and someone says something like “Since my English is poor…”, I tell them that line is absolutely banned.
僕も国際会議の発表練習で「私は英語が下手なので」みたいなことを言う人がいたら「そのひとことは絶対禁止」と言っている。
The first time I taught a class, I told the students “sorry my English is bad,” and my evaluations for that course were awful. From the next year on I told them “If you get used to Japanese-accented English now, it’ll give you an edge later, because you’re definitely going to have to communicate with Japanese engineers someday,” and my course evaluations shot way up.
初めての授業のとき、「英語下手でごめんね」と学生に言ったら、その授業の学生からの評価は散々でした。 よく年から「日本語訛りの英語に今慣れておくと、将来日本人エンジニアと意思疎通をとる必要が絶対出てくるから、その時有利になるよ」といったら、学生からの授業評価は爆上がりしました。
Important post for anyone giving their first presentation in English. Yeah, groveling excuses add exactly zero, so don’t. Even at conferences in Japan. Once I decided my English is bad but “decent enough is fine,” I stopped getting nervous speaking it. Just talk calmly and confidently (or look like you are).
初めて英語でプレゼンする人には重要なポスト。確かにへりくだった言い訳はプラスになる要素がゼロなので良くない。日本国内の学会であっても。自分は英語が下手だがそこそこのレベルで良いやと開き直った時から英語オーラルに緊張しなくなった。淡々と自信をもって(そのように見せて)話す。
I tell my students this all the time: “The audience paid a pricey registration fee and gave up their time to come hear you. Not for your English, but for the new part of your research that, right now, only you in the whole world know. Your job is to get that new part across in the clearest, simplest English you can.”
ワイも学生によく言うやつ 「聴衆が高い参加費と時間を使って聴きに来てる目的はキミの英語ではなく、いま現在世界でキミしか知り得てない研究の新規性の部分なんだから、なるべくわかりやすく簡単な英語でその新規の部分を伝えるのがキミの仕事だ」ってね
Exactly the same in business. Putting yourself down with “sorry my English is bad” only hurts you in negotiations. I want to copy the 🇮🇳 Indian and 🇸🇬 Singaporean mindset of “The English I speak is the global standard, YOUR English is hard to understand.”
ビジネスの場でも全く同じ。「英語が下手でごめん」とか卑下しても交渉のマイナスにしかならない。「俺が話す英語が世界標準だ、お前の英語は分かりにくいな」という🇮🇳インド人や🇸🇬シンガポール人のマインドを見習いたい。
I’ve always felt lip-service modesty and over-the-top self-deprecation aren’t the same as actual humility, and I hate them. The American way here seems healthier to me.
口先の謙遜、過度な卑下は謙虚とは違うと思ってて嫌いなんよな  アメリカのこれのほうが健全だとおもう
Japanese people seriously always throw in a “sorry my English is bad.” Business pitches, research talks, everywhere. We can tell just by listening, and if you think it’s bad, practice until you’re satisfied. Practice, then own it. Why spend precious presentation time saying that? It’s a mystery. My English is bad, but I have a no-apologies policy.
日本人マジで英語ヘタでごめんねって断り入れるよね。ビジネスのプレゼンでも研究発表でも。そんなの聞きゃわかるし、下手だと思うなら納得いくまでプレゼン練習すればいい。練習したうえで堂々とやればいいのに、なぜプレゼンの貴重な時間内に言うのか謎。私は下手だが謝らない主義。
I think this so much. I also can’t stand people who go “I’m kind of nervous, but…” on slide one. There’s nothing in it for us.
これめっちゃ思うわ スライドの1ページ目で「緊張してるんですが」とか言うやつも嫌い こちら側にメリットがない
Kinda get it. I really can’t stand people who, before presenting, maybe to calm their own nerves, say stuff like “I’m nervous” or “It’s my first time so I don’t know if I’ll speak well.” The audience doesn’t care. Keep that much to yourself.
ちょっと分かる。発表の前に自分の緊張を和らげるつもりなのか、緊張してます、とか初めてなので上手く話せるか、とか言うやつ大嫌い。聞いてる方はそんな事どうでもいい。それくらい自分1人で抱えてろ。
Same goes for presentations in Japan (in Japanese). I teach my students not to say anything that makes them sound unconfident in job hunting and so on, even if it’s meant as modesty. If you want to come across as humble, thank people for their questions and criticisms and take them on board openly. “Thank you for that very sharp point. I also consider that an important issue…” (Job hunting in Japan is a highly formalized season in which university students interview en masse for jobs before graduating.)
これ日本(日本語)のプレゼンでも同じ。 学生には、就活等では(謙遜だとしても)「自信がない」と思われることは言うなって教えてる。 謙虚さを伝えたければ、相手から質問や指摘に感謝して、素直に受け入ればよい 「大変鋭いご指摘ありがとうございます。そこは私も重要なポイントだと考えて・・」
Even between Japanese people, there’s this idea that when you give someone food, “This is really delicious, I’d love for you to try it” makes a better impression than “I’m not sure it’ll suit your taste.” (The second one is a stock humble phrase traditionally said when handing over a gift of food.)
日本人同士でも、たとえば食べ物を贈るときに「お口に合うかわかりませんが」よりも「すごく美味しいのでぜひあなたに召し上がっていただきたい」のほうが印象がいい、という考え方がありますね
So Japanese people lower themselves to raise the other person by comparison, while in the US you show humility by lifting other people up directly.
日本人は自分を下げて相手を相対的に上げる。米国では相手を直接持ち上げることで、謙虚さを出すってことですね。
Yep, slipping a quick thank-you to teammates and professors into the start of a speech is standard. Then you go “Also, John, who punched me awake this morning when I was about to be late, seriously love you man” and get a laugh.
わかります、スピーチの冒頭にチームメイトや教授などへの感謝を軽く差し込むのが定番ですよね そして「あと、今日の朝遅刻寸前で殴って起こしてくれたジョン、マジで愛してる」とか言ってひと笑い
American presentations and books always start by thanking colleagues, family and friends. Some books spend like 4 pages on it. Which makes me want to say “Don’t waste the reader’s time on that.”
アメリカ人のプレゼンとか著書って必ず関係者や家族友人への感謝から入るよね。 本に関しては4ページぐらい使ってたりする。 それはそれで「そんなことで読者の時間を奪うな」と言いたい
Being totally full of yourself isn’t great either, but I think Japanese humility is two sides of the same coin with servility, so there’s no need to lower yourself that much.
自信満々なのもどうかと思うけど、日本人の謙虚さって卑屈と表裏一体だと思うから過剰に自分を下げる必要はないと思う
This is a cultural difference. If you’re in America, people in America don’t go around saying “sorry my English is bad” every time. In Japan there’s a culture of lowering yourself out of consideration for others, so I think you just match whoever you’re talking to.
これは、文化の違い アメリカにいるなら、アメリカではいちいち「英語下手でごめんね」は言わない 日本では、相手への気遣いで自分を下げる文化があるので、話す相手に合わせたらいいと思う。
When I was a grad student in the US, speaking English was no problem, so debates were a piece of cake. But I was bad at papers, and every time I turned one in it got rejected with “your English isn’t up to standard.” I went to the writing center over and over and over. It was really rough and I only had bad feelings about it back then, but that experience paid off big time, and now proofreading legal documents is a breeze. Still, I kinda think that was bullying the Japanese kid 🥹
アメリカ大学院生の頃、 英語を喋るのは不自由なかったのでディベートもお茶の子さいさいだったのだけど レポートは苦手でレポート出すたびに英語がなってないと言われて受理されず 何度も何度もwriting centerに通った 当時はすごく辛くて嫌な思いしかなかったけどその経験がすごく生きて今はlegal documentを添削するのも楽勝になった でもあれは日本人イジメだったように思う🥹

A friend of mine came to an art university in Germany as an auditing student. Zero German, barely any English. At the self-intros on day one, even the professor and classmates couldn’t hold back a snicker.

But he was just so open. Stumbling over his broken words again and again, he never gave up. He’d slowly rephrase and scrappily push to get it across.

He clicked with everyone in no time, became basically drinking buddies with the professor, and before long he was such a big part of the vibe that they told him “this class doesn’t work without you.” Out of every Japanese exchange student I’ve seen, he made the most friends by a mile.

In the end, what you need to live abroad isn’t so much whether you have language skills. It’s the attitude of trying to connect with the person in front of you.

ドイツの美大に聴講生として来た友人は、ドイツ語が皆無で英語もほとんどできず、初日の自己紹介では教授やクラスメートも我慢できず失笑してしまう状態だった。 でも、彼はとにかくオープンだった。 つたない言葉で何度も口ごもりながらも、諦めずにゆっくり言い直して、泥臭く相手に伝えようとしていた。 すぐに周囲と打ち解け、教授とも飲み仲間のような関係になり、気づけば「お前がいないとこのクラスは成り立たない」と言われるほどのムードメーカーになっていた。今まで見た日本人留学生ではダントツで友人が増えていた。 結局、外国で生きるとき必要なのは語学力があるかどうかよりも、「目の前の人と通じ合おうとする姿勢」なんだと思う。

My take

So modesty and putting yourself down aren't quite the same thing after all, it seems.
Source & translation note

Comments loosely translated for tone. Reactions collected from Togetter and X threads.

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