Funny Parenting

Boys Come Home With a Wilted Flower. Girls Come Home With the Full Incident Report.

Japanese parents compare notes on the staggering gap between how much boys and girls share after school.

· 7 min · Togetter

What's going on

One image sparked a massive thread among Japanese parents: a side-by-side comparison of how much information a daughter versus a son brings home after school. The girl's side shows a full bouquet. The boy's side shows a single small flower — already wilted.

Parents across Japan piled on with their own stories. Daughters come home and immediately begin narrating every detail of their day — who said what, what happened at recess, what the kid in the next classroom was doing, what was on the menu in the cafeteria, and oh, on the way home a dog did something hilarious. Sons come home and, when asked "how was school today?", reply with one word. Sometimes zero words. Sometimes just a shrug and a trip to the fridge. The information gap between the two is, by all accounts, enormous.

What makes the thread especially relatable is that parents of both agree: their kids are adorable either way. The chaos of too much information and the enigma of too little are, somehow, equally exhausting and endearing.

Comments

← Amount of info girls bring home after school　　　　　Amount of info boys bring home after school →
And even that tiny flower the boy brings? It’s already wilted. (The info is outdated.)
Or completely flattened. Like a pressed flower…
Just to clarify — that’s not a boy handing over a flower. That’s a mom who found a crumpled piece of paper at the bottom of his randoseru (the iconic firm-structured backpacks Japanese elementary school kids carry) and is asking, “what even is this?”
Worst case scenario: just the stem. After all the petals have already fallen off.
lol for real. And even that one tiny flower he brings home is about whatever he found memorable — not anything a parent actually wants to know. Girls are impressive because they even pick up intel through conversations with their friends.
I asked my eldest “how was today?” and he went, “why do you ask me that every single day?”
Me: “How was school?” Son: “It was school.” Me: “…yeah.” Every. Single. Day.
Boys: “dunno.” “can’t remember.” “forgot.” “whatever.” End of conversation.
I was asking him about his day every day and eventually got told, “why do you always ask? you’re so annoying, mom.”
this analogy is genius lol. I have two boys, and whenever I asked what they played at kindergarten, the answer for three straight years was “the slide.” They’re starting elementary school this year. honestly? I’m scared. lol
didn’t realize this was a universal boy thing. My son — ask him who he played with, he says “Hikakin lmaooo” (Hikakin is one of Japan’s biggest YouTubers). Ask him what was for lunch, he says “poop rice lmaooo.” That’s it. That’s all I get.
The one piece of information you’ll ever successfully extract from a boy — only if you really push for it — is what was served for school lunch.
When my eldest was in second grade, I asked what they had for lunch. He said, “um… a small dish and a big dish!” …incredibly helpful.
My son was actually on the “girl side” of this chart. His teacher used to tell him “you’re the only one I can count on for this.” And other moms would come to me going, “I can’t get anything out of my son — what’s yours saying?” That went on until he grew up and left home ___ Still not entirely sure if that was a good thing ___
Won’t talk unless asked. One word when asked. And school notices never make it home. Which is why there are mothers all across Japan screaming the night before a school event.
Important information surfaces the morning of.
Or a week later, first thing in the morning: “I need three milk cartons TODAY!”
this is so accurate. girls never stop talking. boys basically only know “forgot” and “dunno.” both are adorable tho
I have four daughters. They all start talking at once and I genuinely try to listen, but I zone out somewhere in the middle.
Two girls at home = information overload. “So today, during the mid-morning break, A-kun bumped into B-kun and A-kun’s tone was harsh so they got into a fight and C-chan went to get the teacher and the kids from class 3 came to watch, and nobody went to the nurse’s office and they made up in the end so that was good. Oh, and at lunch E-chan…” This goes on for about two hours every day.
Daughter: a walking news bureau. Son: a silent wooden doll. Same family. Two completely different modes of communication.
lol so true. A mom friend once told me that when her daughter visits a friend’s house, she comes home and talks so much you can figure out the entire floor plan 😅 Meanwhile my boys would come home with just “it was fun!!!” Full stop. 😇
From today: Daughter 👧🏻: “Today! I made a necklace at gakudō (after-school care program)!! We climbed the hill on the playground!! And on the way home a dog pooped on the sidewalk BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!” Me, turning to my son: “Hey, I heard you got into a fight and got hurt today. You okay? What happened?” Son 👦🏻: “forgot!” What is even going on???
I relate so hard. Since nursery school, my daughter memorized not just her own lines but everyone else’s in the school play. My son? Even his own role and lines were “dunno” and “forgot” until the day itself. I genuinely want to know how to extract information from a boy. Like, is the information even going in to begin with?
When my brother announced he was getting married, my mom said: “No matter how many times I ask, I can’t figure out anything about his fiancée. He doesn’t seem to know much either. Meanwhile, 🥚 (my nickname) would come home with the girl’s entire life story after one date…” lol
wait — the one who’s actually getting married doesn’t know what she’s like?? Is this a horror story??
getting someone’s entire life story out of a single date is genuinely a superpower
This is a real gender difference fr
I only have a son, so I always assumed other kids were actually chatty at home. Turns out all boys are like this 😂 Honestly, relieved.
same at our place… the “nothing comes out unless you ask” thing is painfully real
I’m almost 40 and my girlfriend has absolutely gotten mad at me for this exact same thing 🥲
like, what’s even the point of telling your parents stuff… and honestly, whatever I was going to say, I forget it the moment I step through the door. Still happens to me now as an adult. Apparently my wife didn’t know I had an ongoing manga serialization (manga: Japanese comic series) for about six months.
wonder how many flowers I’ll be getting from my kid today — it’s the school term opening ceremony 🙄 (mom of an elementary school boy)
for real. Everything that happens to my son outside the house — I find out from his female classmates.

My take

There's definitely individual variation, but as a general trend this feels spot-on. Boys in particular seem to only register what's directly in front of them at that exact moment — everything else just ceases to exist the second they walk through the door. Parents have always had their work cut out for them, no matter the era.

Comments loosely translated for tone.

Source https://togetter.com/li/2683718