Heartwarming CultureParenting

The Only Downside of Living with Grandma Is Getting Fed Too Much

A guy lists the pros and cons of moving in with his grandma — every single con is about food.

· 7 min · Togetter

What's going on

A young man in Japan went viral after posting a pros-and-cons list about moving in with his grandmother last year. The pros were legitimately impressive — she handles all the housework, irons his shirts, whisks him matcha *(a powdered green tea prepared by whisking in a bowl; it's a proper skill that takes practice)*, and passes down old-school wisdom. The "cons," however, gave the internet pause.

Every single downside was about food. She tries to feed him the moment he walks in the door, even when he just ate. She buries him in snacks. And somehow she keeps producing enormous manjū *(traditional Japanese steamed buns filled with sweet red bean paste)* of completely unknown origin. The comments that followed turned into a warm collective memory — elderly people explaining why they do it, grandkids sharing their own overfed stories, and everyone quietly acknowledging that these particular "complaints" are the kind you'll miss for the rest of your life.

Comments

Started living with my grandma 👵 last year.

Pros:

  • Does all the housework
  • Irons my shirts 👔
  • Makes me matcha
  • Teaches me stuff I’d never have learned otherwise

Cons:

  • Tries to feed me even when I literally just told her I already ate
  • Force-feeds me a lethal quantity of snacks
  • WHERE does she even buy manjū that big??
Hold on!! Every single one of those “cons” is also a pro!!! ‼️‼️‼️‼️
The giant manjū lmaooo
The fact that the only downside is “the quantity of food” is kinda beautiful.
Yeah, now that you mention it… there really aren’t any other cons lol
Update: I just got through a massive piece of karaage and she’s already cutting me a thick slab of castella. (Castella is a dense, moist Japanese sponge cake typically sold in large loaf-shaped blocks.)
I feel this so hard… my grandma shoves food at me constantly lol. I’m grateful, I really am… but also… 😭
The enormous manjū got me lmao
Photo of the manjū. Now.
Sorry, it’s already gone. All I can say is — it was big. Like, fist-sized.
My grandma used to give me Yamazaki sake manjū when I was little, and I swear those things were face-sized. Looking at them now they’re still basically fist-sized, so yeah. Big.
Grandmas definitely operate on the assumption that their grandkids are always starving.
That’s just a trait of the elderly. “Anyone younger than me must be hungry.” And honestly — hungry people make bad decisions. So first things first: fill the belly. Sounds like a lovely grandma. 😊
Now that I’m older myself, I finally understand. It just makes her so happy when you eat… whether you’re digging in with gusto or groaning that you can’t fit another bite. Having good food to give, and being able to give it to someone you love — that’s what happiness feels like for her.
I didn’t get it before. But now that I can’t eat as much myself, watching young people pack it away actually makes me happy. The effect is even stronger when it’s family.
It’s not just grandmas — whenever you visit family, they stuff you to the brim and then go “did you put on a little weight?” What even is that
The mystery of feeding you to bursting and then asking if you’ve gained weight — decoded: “Eat, eat more” = I want you full and happy “Did you gain weight?” = I’m worried about your health In conclusion: it’s all love.
As you get older, you just start wanting to feed your family as much as possible. You want them well-fed and healthy.
I used to think the joy elderly people get from feeding their kids and grandkids came from growing up during postwar scarcity (Japan experienced severe food shortages during and after WWII). But maybe it’s just a universal human instinct that kicks in with age.
Yep, that’s just how it is. We old ladies see a young person and immediately want to hand them snacks. It’s just what we are.
Grandmas really do just never stop feeding you lolololol the mikan and senbei (mikan = Japanese mandarin oranges; senbei = rice crackers) never stop coming, and the second your green tea runs low she refills it. Those are the moments I feel most loved. I love you grandma.
Grandmas seriously never stop with the snacks and fruit, but like… grandkids have a limited stomach too… And if you ever mention you like something, she’ll send you home with a bulk supply every single visit. I know it’s huge love, but a full cardboard box of Furuchē (Furuchē is a popular Japanese instant fruit dessert — just add milk and it sets into a creamy pudding) is physically heavy to carry home… still made me happy though.
This made me think of my grandma 🥹 She’d keep refilling my tea no matter how much I drank so I’d be constantly running to the bathroom. She’d sew up the holes in my ripped jeans. Her place always had a ton of snacks. And her insanely sweet tamagoyaki was actually delicious.
I only visit on weekends but every time it’s a mountain of food, and right when I think I’m done she brings out a roll cake 😂 And snacks — eat this, eat this too, have more! 🤣 But she serves everything with this big happy smile so I just keep eating even when I’m dying 😇 I try to eat really light for dinner afterward, but honestly I don’t think it’s working. (looks at own stomach)
That’s just what grandmas do. Sushi, stewed dishes, tempura, karaage, pizza, steak — then for “dessert” she makes you pick coffee or tea and brings out cake, then jelly, then cookies and dorayaki (dorayaki = two small fluffy pancakes sandwiching sweet red bean paste), and then she starts boiling soba or udon. Then for “after-meal tea” she peels an apple and brings out pickles and kuri-shigure. (kuri-shigure = a delicate wagashi sweet made from chestnut and red bean paste)
My grandma makes massive batches of anko (sweet red bean paste), so I get homemade country-style manjū on the hour, every hour. When I get tired of sweets, she resets my palate with pickles.
My grandma grew cabbage in her garden and made these massive mountains of shredded cabbage salad with a generous squeeze of mayo, and I gained a ridiculous amount of weight eating it. I had to ask my mom to tell her to stop — I couldn’t say it myself when she’d gone to all that trouble 😅
Grandmas across the nation operate on the assumption that their grandkids have infinite stomach capacity… 😇
Every single one of those “cons” is just love. They’re the kind of cons that’ll make you ache with nostalgia someday…
She lived alone deep in the mountains, but every time I visited she had a full meal waiting. She’d send me home with bags of vegetables and side dishes, and still slip me pocket money. Looking back now, I can’t believe how lucky I was to have that kind of unconditional love. Made me think of her.
Please hold onto those memories. I still remember every dish my grandma ever fed me. And she’s been gone for over twenty years.
I’ll engrave it in my heart — along with this very heavy stomach. (staring at the bathroom scale)
What a luxury that is. Make sure you talk with her a lot.

My take

You can really feel how much they love their grandkids. And honestly, maybe there's another side to it too — grandparents wanting their grandchildren to need them, even if food is the only way they know how to show it.

Comments loosely translated for tone.

Source https://togetter.com/li/2685810